Last month I posted about our power and ability to say both yes and no to others. This morning I’m thinking about another level of yes and no; that is the yes and no we say to life. At this level, the term ‘consent’ is useful. Consent means to “give permission for something to happen,” Exploring an attitude of consent| Harvesting Stones
#post_contentExploring the importance of contribution in emotional intelligence| Harvesting Stones
Last week’s post was inspired by the work of R.D. Laing in his book, Knots. The first page of this book gave me so much to think about I worked with it for several days before reading all the way to page 3: “It is our duty to bring up our children to love, honour Recognizing bad logic and discussing duty in the context of parent/child relationships| Harvesting Stones
Oxford Online Dictionary lists several meanings for integrity: “The quality of being honest …, the state of being whole and undivided, the condition of being unified …, internal consistency.” Integrity is an important piece of emotional intelligence. Like success, integrity is a quality we define for ourselves. If we don’t do so, the world is Exploring integrity: what does it mean, and what's included in it? How do we develop our own standards of integrity?| Harvesting Stones
This summer is about resource. I've never picked a one-word summer intention before, but today I realize it's been thrust upon me, willy-nilly. The Summer of Resource. I've been working with the idea of minimalism, which forces one to take stock of resource in the wide sense. What is resource? Oxford online dictionary defines resource Defining resource beyond money; exploring how we can best manage resource| Harvesting Stones
All right. I’m thoroughly exasperated by this “I refuse to live in fear” bullshit. Here’s an open letter to all those wannabe heroes out there. Fear is defined as “an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.” (Oxford Online Dictionary) The ability to Fear is an evolutionary advantage and helps keep us alive| Harvesting Stones
I’ve struggled all my life with confusion about the difference between enabling and love. Most of us think of enabling in the context of addiction, and we’re familiar with the idea that helping an addict avoid the consequences of their addiction is not, in the long run, useful. It’s a pretty clear idea in theory. Enabling: what it is, why we do it, and why it doesn't work| Harvesting Stones
I've developed a practice of jotting down a list of events, conversations and observations at the end of every day, not only as a repository of creative prompts but also to identify patterns in my experience. During the last few weeks, perfectionism has appeared repeatedly in my daily lists, my own pursuit of it as Perfectionism; what it is and how to root it out| Harvesting Stones
#post_contentExploring the benefits of boredom| Harvesting Stones
#post_contentThe power of resistance and persistence. Recognizing different aspects of resistance.| Harvesting Stones
I’ve been listening to a Sounds True production of Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes talk about Seeing in the Dark. I’ve listened to it before, but not for some years, and not since I developed a daily practice of sitting and breathing. She suggests that a practice, whether it be meditation, prayer, or whatever else, is Becoming friendly with our most intense feelings; allowing ourselves the fullness of experience| Harvesting Stones
#post_contentExamining the idea of convenience. Is it a worthy goal? At what point do we take it too far? Is it positive or negative?| Harvesting Stones
On the heels of last week’s post about unplugging, I had a conversation with friends about social media and what, exactly, it means to be social. What is a healthy balance of social and solitary? How do we determine if our social lives are appropriate? Predictably, I want to start this exploration with definitions, all Exploring social media and the way we use it; questions about our needs for connection and what authentic connection is| Harvesting Stones
#post_contentExploring the traumatic response of fawning, why we do it and how to develop better strategies to feel safe and loved.| Harvesting Stones
One of my first posts on this blog was about saying no . As I learned emotional intelligence and began applying it to my life, I started to understand how imprisoned I'd been by my inability to say no. In the interests of full disclosure, let me report saying no in the context of long-term Why it's so important to be free to say yes or no and the cost of retaining our power to do so| Harvesting Stones
#post_contentExploring resilience in an offensive world| Harvesting Stones
I’ve noticed the terms “introvert” and “extrovert” popping up frequently in conversations lately. As a lifelong introvert, I also notice a lot of misunderstanding about what the term means. I start, as you knew I would, with definitions. However, it happens I disagree with the online Oxford Dictionary definition of introvert, which is “a shy, What is it like to be an introvert? Do introverts need to be fixed?| Harvesting Stones
#post_contentPart one of understanding boundaries| Harvesting Stones
#post_contentExploring the power of forgiveness| Harvesting Stones
I'm getting ready to turn over the manuscript of my first book to a developmental editor. Getting ready means I'm doing one final read through and combing out overused words and phrases using the search (and destroy) feature in my word processor. Over the months and years I've been working with my book and mastering All the ways our culture teaches women to make themselves small| Harvesting Stones
#post_contentExploring the complexity of communication| Harvesting Stones
One of the most important distinctions I’ve ever learned is the difference between thoughts and feelings. Sadly, I didn’t learn it in public school or higher education. I didn’t learn it from my family. I didn’t learn it from my culture. I didn’t learn it, in fact, until I was 50 years old. What I Separating out thoughts from our feelings; recognizing they may not reflect present reality; taking responsibility for our feeling lives without blaming others| Harvesting Stones
One of my favorite things about life is that changing one subtle thread in the pattern of our behavior and identity can change the whole picture in unexpected but beautiful ways. The overculture promises such a transformation if we buy the right product, but that’s a hollow promise. If we really want change, we have Being over-responsible for others versus being under-responsible for ourselves; learning to switch our unhealthy patterns around responsibility| Harvesting Stones
Managing expectations and recognizing how limited they are| Harvesting Stones
#post_contentDealing with the terrible burden of shame| Harvesting Stones