“No one will ever love you.” Mom jabbed her index finger into my bicep for emphasis, so I would not forget. I almost dropped a dish as I cleaned up the kitchen. “You think you’re better than us, smarter than us, but you’re too stupid to do anything,” she yelled. “Yeah,” chimed in my brother| The Phoenix Spirit
Month: May 2018| thephoenixspirit.com
Take a look below at some examples of life scripts that angry people play out in their lives. You may recognize yourself in these or you might see others you know in them. Even if they don't seem to fit, think about the script and the roles that you may be playing out and try| The Phoenix Spirit
Are parents really in charge of their families today? Most parents would say, "Of course we are!" The more honest answer is, "Probably not." Popular media, peer culture and our very own beloved children themselves often run our families today. Don't get me wrong. We parents really do love our children. It's just that we| The Phoenix Spirit
A real friend is the gift of a lifetime. It is special someone who is in your life in a significant way. Good friendship is a sacred two-sided connection with a person we have much in common with yet also respects differences with each other. A real friend knows our worst qualities and challenges us| The Phoenix Spirit
Q: I've read in books and heard from holistic practitioners that our state of mind contributes to our state of health. In dealing with my own health issues, this leaves me feeling like I just can't win. When I feel the worst physically and out of control of my body, I have to also look| The Phoenix Spirit
Adult Children of Sexual Dysfunction (ACSD) is a 12 Step group of women and men attempting to overcome the effects of growing up in a sexually dysfunctional family. Their common goal is to become sexually, spiritually and emotionally healthy. Below, two members of ACSD share their stories in the hope that others will read it| The Phoenix Spirit
Molly shares about gambling addiction and resources available to those still struggling or in recovery, in the state of Minnesota.| The Phoenix Spirit
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Eleanor Roosevelt, This Is My Story I had an eye-opening experience at church last week. A bunch of ladies at our coffee hour were all talking about their adult kids and how well they were adjusting to the challenges of college life. Being that my| The Phoenix Spirit
We'll feature an expert in the mental health and substance use disorder field to answer questions Q: In terms of addiction, how does the adolescent or young adult brain differ from an adult’s? The adolescent brain is still developing. Young people tend to have less physical effects from drug use (i.e. hangovers, withdrawal) but their| The Phoenix Spirit
This article first appeared in our April 2007 issue of The Phoenix Spirit. Many people believe that punishing and explosive anger is a sign of power, confidence and "being on top of your game." In face, this is not the case at all. Disrespectful anger and even all out rage actually come out of a| The Phoenix Spirit
The Phoenix · Having Healthy Boundaries: A Necessary Way to Love To know where you begin and I end is necessary for me to respect you, for me to be respected by you, and for me to respect myself. Without respect, there is no authentic love. Every time I visit my family I come| The Phoenix Spirit
“If I had to live my life again, I’d make all the same mistakes—only sooner.” — Tallulah Bankhead (1902-1968) One of the most hidden and powerful aspects of human identity is how many of us have shame and harsh judgments towards ourselves. Some of us are barely aware of our self-contempt; others are drowning in| The Phoenix Spirit
I hate being in a group of people I don’t know. If I can find a way to get out of such gatherings I will. My mind gets nuts with anxiety. I fear that I will be seen as abnormal—that people can see my flaws. My voice usually cracks, sweat pours off my forehead, and| The Phoenix Spirit
You know, e v e r y holiday and birthday is like a dagger in my back. Sometimes I just lie on my bed and cry my eyes out. I adopted Maria when she was two-years-old as I couldn’t have children of my own and had no husband. Her mom died of a drug overdose.| The Phoenix Spirit
Hidden shame is a powerful emotional and physiological reaction. It fills our being in covert ways. It can cause us to become violent or withdrawn from life and it can prompt us to bring out the better parts of ourselves in ways we never expected. It is both a curse and a blessing. Typically we| The Phoenix Spirit
Gaming disorder, recently recognized by the World Health Organization as a disease, affects only a small proportion of people who engage in digital- or video-gaming activities. But for those affected, the addiction can be all-consuming, controlling the mind. Gaming addict Julian Struksheats tells his story in this interview with The Phoenix Spirit. The interview has| The Phoenix Spirit
Hi, my name is John Tolo. Here is my recovery story. I grew up in the toughest ghetto in New England outside of New York City. My family was the only white family in a neighborhood that was mostly Black and Hispanic. We moved there in 1972, at a time when racial tensions were high.| The Phoenix Spirit
We know we can’t save anyone from their pain and suffering. We know trying to rescue or change someone in the throes of addiction drains us to the point of depletion; it becomes a never-ending cycle of feeling hopeless and helpless. We desperately want to maintain hope and feel guilty if we give up. The| The Phoenix Spirit