After forty years on the planet, you’d think I would be used to this. Public shame about my body. Opinions of strangers. The eyes. The laughs. The echo of car horns and abuse hurled from passing motors. That feeling of being overlooked or underestimated due to my size, or worse, being looked over and assessed and found wanting. Derision that seeks to and often succeeds in sending me into hiding. Into my mind. Into poetry. Into the safety of the lifelines I know best. | The Stinging Fly
February 2020. I’m in Rome, on a short break with my sister. It’s two months away from the launch of my debut novel and I’m searching for shoes. Along Via del Corso, I find them, elegant and punky, with heels just the right side of negotiable. Undecided between the green and the black—which will work better with the silk pleated skirt I’ve been saving?—I uncharacteristically splurge and buy both. This giddiness is short-lived: in April, two weeks into lockdown, the novel is publis...| The Stinging Fly
When I was publicly announced as a Granta Best Young British Novelist, I was working in a wine shop. I felt insecure as no one else on the list seemed to work a job like mine, and I probably felt a little vain too: ‘Why is a Granta Best Young British Novelist being yelled at for shelving beer cans badly?’| The Stinging Fly