August 2025 Archives| Defenestration
2008–2011: Writers’ Strike & Depression I thought I’d get paid more after the writers’ strike because that’s what me and my bedazzled Writers’ PAs are the backbone of the industry! signs were for. But a bunch of writers’ PA jobs were cut, so I had an important decision to make: move back to my parents’ mansion in Bethesda or dumpster dive for Subway sandwiches near the Santa Monica Pier. So, dumpsters it is!| Defenestration
Hello, everyone! Welcome to the August 2025 issue of Defenestration, the literary magazine dedicated to humor and one of the few artifacts that will remain after the apocalypse (alongside cockroaches, AOL discs, and Twinkies). We're happy you've decided to join us this month for an adventure into the surreal and absurd. You won't be disappointed.| Defenestration
Last night I couldn't sleep. The holidays do that to me. I went downstairs, figuring I'd make myself a little snack. A chocolate chip cookie and milk, maybe – nothing crazy. But even before my hand gripped the stainless-steel handle of my smart fridge, its display lit up: Wouldn't it be better to just call your mother? "It's two-a.m." I said. "I'm just hungry."| Defenestration
There they are again, unboxing their fucking noise-makers. Attaching long orange snakes from my walls to their things, horridly neon things. God, what an endless din. I watch them through gaps in the lath, peeking out between its cracks. Rattling vibrations shake me loose from my nap and I slipped through a fresh hole in the plaster.| Defenestration
Leila's front wheel wobbles when she cycles over a crack in the tarmac. A car behind blares its horn as she struggles to steady the books in her basket and keep her summer dress from flaring up. 'You daft old cow,' the driver yells as he overtakes. He waves a flabby arm at her, blurry tattoos str| Defenestration
Dear Kevin in 3C: Congratulations on the five-day bender. Incredible. How did all those people fit in your apartment? My wife and I thought nothing would ever top your last Labor Day marathon. You’re an inspiration, Kevin. We used to get wild. The baby made us forget. But you’re our reminder, Kev| Defenestration
When the tiny plastic tube, ironically resembling a tampon, shows a pink plus sign, I know that I have gotten the job. Urine talks and mine says, “CONGRAT-U-HADSEXWITHSOMEONERECENTLY-LATIONS.” Now begins a journey. Now begins the transition into motherhood.| Defenestration
Whenever the honeysuckle starts to bloom, I’m reminded of the spring when everyone decided it was a great idea for me to ride the back seat of a tandem bicycle with my father-in-law. He wasn’t even my father-in-law yet, which made this imposed, volun-told decree even more profoundly horrible.| Defenestration
My dear fellow members of the Agatha Christie fan club, as club President, I speak to you today in a time of intense sadness for our organization. It has now been two weeks since our newest member, my dear friend Fred, has died, and unfortunately, the police are no closer to cracking his case. His d| Defenestration
1. A boy being caught with his shirt tail untucked and hanging out of his pants. 2. Chewing gum anywhere on the school grounds at any time. 3. Not returning an empty cafeteria lunch tray to the dish washing area. 4. A boy’s hair growing over the tops of his ears by a little as 1/32 of an in| Defenestration
May 2025 Archives| Defenestration
It was my sophomore year at college, and while my fellow classmates were busy studying for finals, I was training for our local taqueria’s first hot-pepper–eating contest, knocking back as many habanero peppers as I could before passing out. I didn’t have any career plans then and must’ve changed my| Defenestration
It's still technically summer, and while I know you're impatiently waiting for the onset of sweater weather, never fear: the August 2024 issue of Defenestration is here, so at the very least you won't be bored. (At least for now. I don't know how long it will take you to read six short stories and s| Defenestration
