Services | The Cynical Developer
A grounded voice in an industry that loves its own hype.| The Cynical Developer
A grounded voice in an industry that loves its own hype.| The Cynical Developer
A 6-week program for mid-career developers who feel stuck, coasting, or drifting. Stop autopiloting. Start steering.| The Cynical Developer
If your team’s retros feel like pointless venting sessions, you’re not alone. Here’s a small fix that helped us shift the tone — and a free guide if you want more.| The Cynical Developer
Occasional cynical essays. No spam. No meeting invites.| The Cynical Developer
Want a dose of dry wit and hard-earned lessons at your event or in your codebase? I speak and consult on legacy systems, privacy, burnout, and fixing things that actually matter.| The Cynical Developer
The Cynical Developer is a blog for tired engineers, reflective skeptics, and anyone who’s seen too many “Next Big Things” end up as tomorrow’s tech debt. This site is maintained by a seasoned developer with a mild aversion to buzzwords and a fondness for refactoring code and expectations. Here, you’ll find honest commentary on software, systems, and staying sane in tech. The guy behind The Cynical Developer I’ve been building software for two decades — sometimes well, sometimes...| The Cynical Developer
Want to reach out? I’m happy to hear from fellow devs, writers, or the hopelessly over-engineered. Email: hello@thecynical.dev Please don’t send cold sales pitches. I’m not that kind of cynical. Got something to say? Use the form below. Please, no recruiter spam or marketing pipelines. Nigerian princes are fine. Don’t fill this out: Your Name: Your Email: Message:| The Cynical Developer
Last updated: 28th May 2025 Right now I’m somewhere between keeping old Java systems running and rewriting blog layouts at midnight. The later being far more fun and useful than the former. I’m also solo parenting while my wifes on a trip so I’m cheif cook, cleaner, and taxi driver as well. Oh and the new kitten is chewing all the things. ⚙️ What I’m Working On Modernizing legacy EJBs without losing my mind Rebuilding this site because I needed a distraction from real work Trying ...| The Cynical Developer
Refactoring is supposed to make code better — not just different. Here’s how to tell if you're improving something or just rearranging the mess.| Posts on The Cynical Developer
When your public health system accidentally nails every hallmark of a phishing scam — and calls it a service.| Posts on The Cynical Developer
Somewhere between title inflation and egalitarian delusion, the meaning of 'Senior Developer' got lost.| Posts on The Cynical Developer
Scrum Masters, Release Managers, and the illusion of progress in a world that should know better.| Posts on The Cynical Developer
A cynical developer's guide to why OKRs often fail, how they sometimes help, and what to do when you're assigned 15 of them.| Posts on The Cynical Developer
Scrum helped us escape the waterfall. But it’s become more ceremony than substance—and the real work is happening in the cracks between stand-ups.| Posts on The Cynical Developer
Because @Stateless shouldn’t require 3 XML files and a blood sacrifice.| Posts on The Cynical Developer
Agile was never supposed to be a checklist. Somewhere between the ceremonies and the certifications, we forgot what it was for.| Posts on The Cynical Developer
Getting from command-and-control to trust and autonomy—and why most teams never quite make it.| Posts on The Cynical Developer
The startup origin story you've lived through at least once—and what usually comes next.| Posts on The Cynical Developer
A grounded voice in an industry that loves its own hype.| The Cynical Developer
When every dev is just doing the next ticket, who’s steering the ship?| The Cynical Developer
